Saturday, February 4, 2012

The Rest of the Story....

So, last night, the Darlin' Man gets a phone call. I thought it was from work...until I heard him ask "Should I bring a bag or something to put it in?"
I cornered him as he was edging towards the door and he told me he had gotten a "killer deal" on a turkey. A turkey we could fatten up for Thanksgiving.
Where would we put said turkey?
"Oh", he replied breezily, "we can just tuck him in with the goats or something."
Uhmmm...I dunno.....
So, he brings home this behemoth of a turkey. HUGE.  Turkey-zilla.
We put the giant bird in with the goat babies and the Darlin' Man goes to bed.
I stayed up a bit, watching a show I had missed earlier in the week. The Boy and Girl had gone with friends to see a movie and I was waiting up for them, too. (Like many Mom types, I cannot get to sleep until I know everyone is home and safe.)
The Boy comes in and grabs the flashlight as soon as he hits the door yelling "Something is trying to get in after the baby goats!"
I run out with him...and all his feathered glory is the turkey, perched on top of the fence of the pen and about to launch himself into the neighbors yard.
I dive into the pen and launch myself at the darn bird and manage to grab him.
Lesson #1 Turkeys are strong.
The turkey begins flapping and fighting. Don't blame him. If someone snuck up behind me late at night and grabbed me, I imagine I would toss up a ruckus, too! Add to that the fact that I was in my nightgown and fuzzy slippers...I imagine I was pretty much a turkey nightmare!
Lesson #2 This turkey is full grown, full grown turkeys are heavy.
I am not a weakling. But a full grown 20+ pound turkey in full panic mode is tough to handle! I managed to hug him close tome and pin his wings down and dash to the peafowl pen.I flung him in there and discovered something else.
Lesson #3 Turkeys in panic mode crap. A LOT.
I stomped back into the house and headed for the shower. My Darlin' Man, who had slept through the festivities, was perturbed that I woke him up by taking a shower. "Why are you taking a shower now? You just took one a couple hours ago!"

Dear readers...I will not post what was said by myself in the five minutes that came next.My statements at that moment were made under a great deal of stress...and, as we all know, statements made under a great deal of stress are not to be taken seriously.
Something like this:
Anyway, went out this morning to discover the turkey (now christened Timothy) had decided to make amorous advances toward Penelope the peahen AND Ugly Betty the chicken. Neither of the girls were happy!
Construction on a turkey pen commenced quickly. By eleven thirty a.m., Timothy Turkey was settled in.
On to Molly and her twin boys...
While we were constructing the turkey pen, I was keeping an eye on Molly, she seemed to be a bit restless.
I got caught up in construction, plus making lunch, plus I had a pan of cajeta cooking down on the stove, so admittedly, I wasn't keeping a close eye on Molly.
I noticed she wasn't wandering around her pen as usual,

I let the Darlin' Man go to town by himself again.

I know...I know. I should know better by now.
Say hello to our newest resident:

Meet Trixie.

Back to our regularly scheduled post...
I went over to the big goat pen and there was Molly, pawing away and then plopping down in the straw in the goat house. I ran to grab my birthing kit and yelled for everyone else...
By the time I got out there, she had delivered one and was in the middle of delivering the other. I had to actually pull the second kid, as it was so large it got stuck!
Both mama Molly and her twin boys are doing fine. I went out and took a few more pictures to show how squeeeeeeeeeee! cute they are!
This is Morpheus, the one I had to pull.
 And this is Maximus!
Molly and her boys!
Now, if you'll excuse me,I need to go take an aspirin and possibly take a nap.
Or perhaps a nice strong drink.
"I wonder what her problem is? Is she screaming?"


  1. I swear, your husband should NOT be allowed to go to the feed store!

    What cute (and huge!) kids....I love those floppy ears!

  2. You're a nut, Lamby, and so is your Darlin' Man! Wonder if Timothy was trying to escape because he overheard the part 'fatten up for Thanksgiving' part? LOL

  3. Thank you for such a richly descriptive tale. Living on a small farm ourselves we can relate to the unintended happenings of over enthusiasm.


  4. I laughed my butt off picturing you with turkey crap spread over you and your clothes...thanks for the fun.

  5. It is funny NOW, 11pm last night...not so much.
    Carolyn Renee...I wonder if I could convince the Feed store to make the Darlin'Man be accompanied by a responsible adult to enter the store?
    HossBoss...I am hoping the Darlin' Man will go through with butchering him!
    Anon....yes, every day is a surprise here!

  6. Never a dull moment is there? Well as sorry as I am that you ended up on the wrong end of an upset turkey....lmao....I'm glad to hear the twins made it fine. That still leaves you one more expectant mother doesn't it?

  7. adorable babies!!!!! yay!! so glad all are healthy and Timothy looks delicious! I mean very healthy too....

  8. Tina, I have TWO expectant mama goats here. Nina and Lily. And since all the others had twins this season....I am sorta expecting them to have twins,too.
    Kellie,we already have two guys that want to buy the new boys...they want them as bucks for their herds. We are hoping Timothy gets up to about 40 pounds, then he'll dress out to about 25-30 pounds.

  9. Oh my goodness. I am snorting with laughter, because I can totally see that all happening in my minds eye. And I would have totally come unglued at the shower comment. Beautiful babies!

  10. Ruth..."unglued" is an apt term for what happened!


Because of a couple of rude people that left comments that included links to porn pages and such, I have been forced to start moderating comments again.