The Best Laid Plans...

So, today was going to be the day I made a new tabletop for the kitchen table. I had it ALL planned out. I had read the instructions on the tile adhesive, the grout, planned out where each tile would be placed and so on.
I was going to start the project at 8 a.m., right after the kids left for school.
Oops.
7:15 a.m. I wake up the kids...Girl dives into the shower and Boy...groans.Huh?
A closer inspection shows Boy to be wheezy, red eyed and running a fever and complaining that his chest felt like it was burning inside.Then wheeze, cough, cough.
I yell at Girl to get out of the shower asap. She runs to her room in her bathrobe to get dressed for school and I shove Boy in the bathroom and turn the shower on high and HOT, steaming up the bathroom. Boy is ordered to sit in there until I come to retrieve him.
Girl leaves for the school bus with a breakfast burrito I quickly made in her hand.
I retrieve Boy from shower. He says he feels a little better, but has a bad headache and feels, in fact, achy all over. I give him some non-aspirin fever reducer/pain reliever (which I hate to use, but I am kinda paranoid about Reyes) and a hot cup of herbal tea and start breakfast for him.
At this point I hear a ruckus in the yard.
The dogs are out for their morning romp around the yard. I look, and one of the chickens is also out in the yard...how the heck did THAT happen?...and the fellas dog is merrily chasing the chicken around the yard while my dog sits on the patio and barks encouragement.
I dive into the fray and finally grab one very flustered and panicked chicken (it was Chloe, one of the Rock Island girls) and open the chicken coop to shove her in. I didn't have my broom with me.
I. DIDN'T. HAVE. MY. BROOM.
This fact registers immediately with Red (the psychotic rooster) and he launches himself at me as I get the coop door open. I fling Chloe in, hoping that will distract Red, but no such luck! Red continues his attack and makes it out of the coop.
Just a bit of an observation here...if you are running from a deranged rooster, it is best to be dressed appropriately.
A nightgown and fuzzy hot pink slippers are NOT appropriate.
But I digress...
I retreated from Red's attack and take off for the patio to get the broom. Red, sensing he had the upper hand, chases me with all the fury his chicken legs can muster. The fella's dog, Andy, decides to chase Red. The rooster seeing a new opponent, is momentarily distracted...but only momentarily, as when he turns to face Andy, he manages to swat Andy across the face with a wing. The dog, startled, yelps and high tails it for the back door...right in my path to the broom!
I managed to NOT trip over the darn dog (for a change) and make it to the patio.
I grabbed the broom and turned to face the rabid rooster...as he had launched himself in the air at me, talons out. I swing...and miss.
However, that swing was enough for Red to flutter to the ground and rethink his strategy. He looks back to the chicken coop (assessing his audience?), but there's no help for him there. Miss Chloe is in a corner of the coop with the other hens gathered around her, clucking in sympathy. Red looks at me again and turns and begins a leisurely strut across the yard, back to the coop.
I finally get Red back in the coop.
I get back in the house and find the bacon a bit charred around the edges. I crumble up the best of it and put it, along with some scrambled eggs, in a tortilla for the Boy.
Breakfast delivered, I sit down and catch my breath.
I finally got to the table, but didn't have a camera as my friend with the camera is visiting friends out of town today.I am waiting for the adhesive to *cure*, and then I can get to the grout.
Patches the goat is still pregnant.
I need to vacuum.
More than that, I need a nap....
And I have to go out in about an hour and gather eggs and feed the chickens...