Unlike Carmen Santiago (remember that program?), I decided to return to where this whole strange trip started.
Yes, I am back in New Hampshire.
No, I have not seen the darlin' (?) man, even though he is still at the farm, a scant 5 miles away.
It is not time and I don't know when that time will come.
Yes, I still love him desperately. He says he still loves me.
But we are keeping our distance until he can work on himself and I can do the same for myself.
Besides missing him, I am missing my goats and other animals.
But I LOVE being back in New Hampshire.
Despite living around the world and around the country, with a significate amount of that time in the American South, particularly Virginia, New Hampshire is HOME.
The first time I stepped out of my car here and walked down the street in this small town, I knew this was home.
I am home and I am here to stay.
I am here to fight.
I am here to fight for my home, the life I need/want to live, and most importantly, to fight for the man I love.
I will fight to see that he is healed and whole. Even if we do not end up together, I want to see him in a better state of mind, with his demons subdued or banished altogether.
I know many will criticize my decision, but then again, they do not have to live my life.
So, peace to all, and send me some good vibes as I enter the fray!